Mist among the Clarity

I am always amazed at how some folks just grow up, knowing exactly what they want to be! I truly have always been in awe of those people.  More than anything I wish I was one of those people.  Clarity has always been some what of a distant dream.  It comes in bits and pieces.  Moments of flashes,  and random thoughts that can sometimes go, as quickly as they came.  I hear a lot about clarity and living your passion.  That the two go hand and hand.  To have one, you must have the other.  I must say that this topic, has created more anxiety and dread in my head for far too long.  Which is why after much contemplation, I just simply decided to let it go.  Not everyone works in the same way.  We don’t all come to conclusions through the same path, thoughts, or journeys.  I have decided that clarity is not the end product for me.  It’s more about the journey.  It’s about learning, reading, trying, and consciously being aware of my bits and pieces of clarity when they make themselves present.  I don’t need to have a perfect design plan, or a well thought out journey to enjoy the moment.  In all honesty I think many people unnecessarily suffer from stress, anxiety, and defeat because they get far too caught up in the end results.  It’s wonderful to know where you want to go? What you want to be? But it’s just as much of a wonder, to live today and enjoy this moment.

It hasn’t been an easy process to let go.   I still often find myself reading someones blog, website or Facebook and wonder how they perfectly come across as,  This is who I am?  This is what I do?  And this is how I can help you?  Like wow!  Fantastic.  But for me anyways it didn’t help.  Lots of great sites, information, well thought out plans, actions to take, quizzes to do, and all kinds of creative ventures that really fabulous people have designed, researched and created to help people like me.  The ever so slightly wishy washy, indecisive, layed back, nonchalant, mid-life bohemian, country gal.  Don’t get me wrong.  Love, love, love the information.  It’s amazing how much work these incredible folks have put into their products.   The dedication just blows me out the water.  I mean seriously I read one guys blog this morning, and watched a 3 minute video he had made, and I seriously wanted to cry!  I was so moved by his integrity, honesty, and incredible ability to care and share everything he has learned, as to make total strangers lives better! The guy was amazing! I have followed his blog for quite some time.  I know the story, and how he grew into his passion.  The one thing he knew for sure, was that he was interested in making other’s lives better.  The how’s, why’s, where’s and when’s didn’t matter.  He didn’t have a exact thought out plan of action.  He learned.  His journey was about knowing he wanted to help, and that was always at the forefront of everything he did, from that moment forward.

I know I will have my ups and downs.  I am 100% sure that there will be mist among the clarity.  I am certain that it will be a learning experience, a journey with a vague destination, and struggles with the rewards.  But just like this young mans awesomely inspired blog,  even if it takes 4 years or more to reach my destination,  I will not give up on what’s my passion.  The passion to help other’s dream, to support folks who have never had support.  To boost the self esteem of woman who are in transition and are feeling upside down.  I know what it’s like, to lose a lot, and not know if it’s going to be alright.  No one should feel that way.  Everyone should have dreams, and have someone in their corner, pushing them, routing for them, inspiring, motivating, and helping them to believe in their amazing self worth!!

Link to photo source: Below

Not your ordinary, “How are you today?”

Ok,  sometimes I just have to throw people off.  Make them stop for a moment, and ponder what I really said.  Of course, I work with a great group of sarcastic, mouthy, witty woman! You gotta love em’.  No matter how shitty things can get at work,  they will liven it up, even if management blows a gasket.  I love them!  I have an approximately 35-40 minute drive to work everyday, so it gives me plenty of wake up time, huge cup of coffee, and some of my best brainstorms are in my car first thing in the morning, with nothing but me and the silence.  I use to dread the long drive, thinking that I could be doing one more thing at home, finished the dishes, started the laundry, paid that bill, but there’s always one more thing.  Now I treasure my morning drive.  It gives me a sense of clarity, how I am going to start my day, what articles I may work on when I get home, how can I make someone else’s day better.  These are the many things I ponder on my drive to work.

 

So, this morning I decided to see who was paying attention to what I actually said.  You know the normal, you really don’t care but say it anyways.. “How are you today?”   I mean really, we say it, but do we actually hear what the other person says?  Or is it more of a formality, politeness that we have developed in our hurrying society?  Instead of the normal ritual, I walked in and asked “Are you happy today?”.  My first response,  “What the f^%$ kinda question is that?”  I couldn’t help but laugh.  The next was, “Well, I’m here.  What do you think?”.  I got a bunch of laughs, and well you just made me laugh…So I am now!  The response was mixed with laughter, sarcasm and humor, setting the morning tone with laughter, and lightness.

 

If anything came of that morning,  it was that it is good to change up the routine.  The normal, boring, melancholy of “How are you today?” just doesn’t express that we truly do care how someone is.  It has become a sad statement, in which we really could care less what the answer is.  I’ve decided I’m not going to express myself in a manner,  that doesn’t ask truly what I care about.  And I do care if people are happy! I want the world to be happy, or atleast to think about it, work towards it, and know that it is within all of our reach, to be truly happy.

 

How can you change up your daily interactions with the world, so that to inspire people to show up for their own lives?

 

 

 

The Mid-Life, Bohemian, Hippy Chick..Would love feedback on her visions! :)

I have been researching endlessly options available to facebook, for a combination  storefront/blog.  There are apps out there, but with my limited tech knowledge I need to keep it simple, not to mention manageable on a daily basis.  So for now less is best.  I also have been reading, researching information on how to go about setting them up, and how to attract an audience.  Social Media, to let you know, completely overwhelms me! There is a link for every site, a platform for this and an app on that.  Really, really when it all comes down to it….I draw a blank and get slightly overwhelmed.  Which was exactly how I was feeling this morning. I have a pretty good vision on what it is I want to accomplish.  But it’s getting it out there, and keeping it out there.

So I ran across an article the other day, on making your blog/storefront/business page stand out.  After reading that article, I have gotta say I was even more stressed out. I’ve got a brainstorm.  A reason why I want to do this, but yet can’t seem to figure out how to put it into place.  I am computer brain dead compared to most people, and as for marketing.  Well….. I’ve never been in sales, if that tells you anything.  Let alone sell myself. Youch! Yea, I know there are people that are totally fabulous at it.  They could literally sell Ice to an Eskimo.  Well, to be frank….I couldn’t and wouldn’t.   For the very simple reason, I wouldn’t believe in it.  They don’t need it, so why the heck would I sell them something they don’t need.  To me, it’s wrong on all levels.

Bare with me, as I am totally ADD, and ramble from time to time.  One of the first things the article stated was that in order to really make a go of a blog, storefront, facebook page or what have you, you need to stand out! Ok… That’s a pretty obvious one.  The next part, it all of the sudden hit me.  It said, “People HATE boring!”  I agree to an extent.  But isn’t boring defined differently by everyone.  Just like success, or love.  Not everyone sees things the same way.  Lucky for me! The article talked about making sure you had a catchy, far fetched title, a crazy story line to feed people, or some very over the top, outrageous goal that you are putting out their for the world to scrutinize or cheer you on. Well that would all be lovely if you were a far fetched, crazy, extrovert of a person.  But what happens to the down to earth,mid-life, tech challenged, bohemian, hippy, boring, introvert gal!?! Where does she fit in???

So I am sitting in the parking lot at work this morning, jotting notes a hundred miles an hour, being 10 minutes late for work.  I didn’t want to forget a single idea, phrase, thought between then and now…Being that it’s 10 hours later.  I don’t think I have missed a beat yet.  And well even if I have, the general idea is here.  For you to read, and me to re-read, while contemplating on how you go from catchy, crazy extrovert, to simply down to earth introvert.  It is really putting my normal thought process to the test.  I am having to think outside of my normal patterns of thinking, and trying to stimulate parts of my brain that I don’t use very often.  I am by nature a creative person, so thinking outside of the box has never been a problem for me. But thinking of putting myself out there, and saying to the world here I am! Honestly I have never wanted to be in the spot light.  I could care less about being famous, or known.  The only thing I have ever wanted in my life, is to be a success in my own right, to be able to be a great mom and guide my girls through the challenges of life, if they should need me and to be a positive influence on other woman, whom are going through transitions in life, and needing some guidance and support while making these choices.

I know what it’s like to get a divorce, move away from your comfort zone, because you can no longer afford the life you once lived.  I know what it’s like to lose your job, and not be able to find another one, making close to what you were making before.  And all of this happened in a two year period.  I was a whirling, out of control, walking disaster.  I also know what it’s like to have very little support system in place, coming from a completely dysfunctional family, that just didn’t know how to give me what I needed.  I am sure they wanted to, but they were never taught, and there fore didn’t.  Some how though, and not even close to perfectly, I have managed to keep my head above water, make new friends, my brain and heart once again spins wildly with creative ideas and energy.  I have learned more about taking care of me, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually that I did in the 20+ years I was married.  I truly believe everything happens for a reason.  I think that without a doubt I am still growing into the person I am meant to be, and I know with everything in me, I will be fine.  This is what I want to give to the many woman out there, who doubt that! I see it every day, and it breaks my heart.  I would love that to be my legacy. To show woman who have never had direction, support or inspiration, that their life is theirs! I want to inspire women to think there is more to life than working a job they hate, for little money and barely getting by.  To think that they have something to offer to the world.  To believe that they are worthwhile in every way! Big dreams, but I believe in them, and that’s what keeps me energized and focused with my heart!

So once again, I go back to the do I change the name of my blog, and try to configure something more catchy to draw people in, something over the top and not so true to me…Or do I find something that clearly demonstrates what I am trying to convey.  Or do I simply stick with what I have going right now…And keep pushing this, hoping that people will read what I am writing, and hoping to do in my future for other woman’s futures.

Would absolutely love some feedback!